


A Ridiculous Dog

by DictionaryWrites



Category: Cabin Pressure
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-09
Updated: 2014-03-09
Packaged: 2018-01-15 05:05:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1292458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DictionaryWrites/pseuds/DictionaryWrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for a prompt on the kink meme. When MJN has a flight and Herc has some free time, he pet-sits Snoopadoop.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Ridiculous Dog

The animal began to bark as soon as Herc made his way up the path, if it truly  _could_  be called barking. He had never heard an animal make a noise as utterly God awful as that - a howl-bark- _yodel_ , Hercules would call it.

He unlocked the door and looked down; Snoopadoop was silent. It sat on the ground, looking up at Herc with its farcical face and its absurdly large, brown eyes. 

"Hello, you ridiculous dog."

“ **Arf arf arf-** ”

” _No._ " The dog stopped again, blinking at Herc’s firm tone. The captain stepped inside, pushing the door closed behind him. He moved into the living room, dropping onto Carolyn’s sofa, and took a book out of his satchel - his handbag, as Carolyn delighted in calling it.

He did not know why he had agreed to pet sit. Snoopadoop had, apparently, chewed up one of the kitchen table legs, and when Carolyn had little money to spare, such things were not ideal. He leaned forwards, peering into the kitchen across the hall, and yes, that table looked distinctly  _chewed_   _up_.

"Snoopadoop, here." Herc was not unused to giving commands, not at all, and the animal took well to it; she jumped up on the sofa obediently and lay down, head on Hercules’ thigh. "Good girl."

He set the book aside for the time being, stroking over her ears - if there was something to be said for cockapoos, they were terribly soft of fur. 

"Now, a little bird tells me you don’t like being left on your own." He said softly, and the animal just looked up at him, eyes doleful. Why ever did dogs have such sad eyes? It wasn’t fair at all: it made a man feel terribly guilty for no reason at all.

They had set out for Beijing today, all four of the MJN crew, with a trio of dancers due for the ballet. Herc had attempted to convince Carolyn that he could come along and they could see it together; as a concession they were going to see the newest production of Cats on Friday instead.

Hercules adored ballet and opera over plain musicals, but Cats was undoubtedly a favourite of his, and it had been the only production he’d managed to convince Carolyn to see. Arthur was coming along too, though he did worry somewhat about getting her alone if Arthur was going to be around-

Well. That was an  _idea_.

"Do you know, Snoopadoop, I am going to seduce someone tonight."

“ **Ruarm?** " Such an oddly vocal dog, but so he was told, most labradors and cocker spaniels were.

"Yes, yes I am." Herc cooed, pulling his phone out of his pocket and dialling a number.

“ _What do you want, Hercules?_ ”

“ _Hallo, Herc!_ " 

"Hello, boys. How fares the air?"

“ _Oh, very well! Not nearly as much cloud cover as I thought._ ”

“ _I’m not your boy_.”

"How would you two like free tickets to see one of the best shows on the West End on Friday?"

_"Which show is that?"_

“ _Why_?”

"Cats, Martin." Hercules said lightly, amused by how sharp Douglas’ tone was: what a grumpy fellow. Snoopadoop regarded the phone with apparent bafflement.

“ _Oh_.” Douglas sounded perfectly irritated; Herc was quite certain Douglas enjoyed this particular musical almost as much as he did, and it made it somewhat difficult to retort an immediate no.

"There is a catch."

“ _Of course there is_.” Douglas purred, and Hercules chuckled to himself.

“ _What catch, Herc_?” Martin sounded far more chipper than Douglas, of course, and was being far politer. 

"Take Arthur for the evening, once the show is over. I don’t care where: I’ll give you money for a strip club if that’s what it takes, just keep him away from the house for the evening."

“ _Herc! We’re not going to take him to a strip club!”_

“ _Oh, dear God, really? You want us to take Arthur so that you can fu-“_

_"Douglas!"_

_"Oh, come now, we both know what it’s for."_

"Is that a no?"

“ _Of course it’s not a no. A strip club will be fine.”_

 _"Douglas!"_  Martin all but yowled the words, and Snoopadoop issued a howl in retort; Douglas was forced to hide a snort of laughter behind his mouth. 

“ _Herc? What was that?”_

"Nothing, Douglas, nothing. But you will do it?"

“ _Oh, yes_.”

“ _Oh, no_ -“

“ _Oh,_   ** _yes_** _._ " Douglas interrupted Martin immediately, and then the line went dead; they’d hung up. Hercules smirked to himself, dropping his phone aside.

"Am I going to take your Mummy to bed tonight, Snoopadoop?  _Yes_. Yes, I am. I am going to take your Mummy to bed.” Around anyone else, Hercules would never have descended to coo as he did in front of anyone else, but he was alone, and the dog wouldn’t tell anyone.

“ **Arf!** ”

"Yes, that’s  _right_ : good girl.” Herc glanced to the book, and then to the television, beside which rested a red basket full of grooming implements. He stood, moving to grasp a brush, and patted his lap for the dog to come closer.

Snoopadoop was less than amenable to being brushed in such a fashion, but eventually she did deign to allow it; Herc did not last for long. His head dropped back and a small grin came to his face at the thought of some alone time with Carolyn - Snoopadoop dropped to sleep with her face mashed against his knee.


End file.
